It's Halloween! (to quote The Shaggs)

mine ... no, mine ... no way, dude, mine

This year's theme was SCARY


yeah, I'm the ghost from Ringu and my feet are very cold. The cousin is a zombie and she gets to wear socks, damn her. The undead get all the perks.


You can't see it, but the orange shirt had anarchist writing and spikes -- and we bought it that way. To me, that's the scariest part of the costume.


(psst ... she's The Dark. See? or not see as the case may be)


Would you like me to tell you the little story of right-hand/left-hand?

And, as usual, Jeff is the winner again this year. This even tops the appearance as Peter Marshall at the television party (Mama mia! E Gene Rayburn, non e Peter Marshall. Grazie Signore Mitchum. I presentori di televisione tutti osservano egualmente a me):

There are children here somewhere. I can smell them.

If I had a hammer, I'd toot my own horn

Okay, I built a bridge and got over the whole grammar thing -- mostly because Mr. Writing 121 gave me 100% on my first essay -- 100 out of 100, yo. Is this one of the benefits of curve grading? I just don't know ... but I suspect and that's almost the same as knowing, but without the actual knowledge.

Plus I seemed to have also snowed over the Comp Lit instructor who gave me an A on my first paper in that class. She also keeps giving me 10/10 on the quizzes. pffft I was totally going to drop that class because I thought I was blowing it.

Hopefully these classes will balance me against Italian, where I'm stuck in a B-rut (brut?). Frickin' languages don't give you any space to maneuver. You have to know that the word is spelled spiaggia and it's come stai not sta when you're speaking informally. Mama mia, there's just no way to finagle it with those people.

I'm only saying that I have nothing to say

Things I have learned over the past 4 weeks:
- Grammar isn't important. Or it is. Or it's only important for 10 points, at which time it will then become unimportant again.
- The process by which networks sell shows to affiliates is Deficit Production, not Creative Financing.
- Twinings online tea shop blows. No wonder the market doesn't carry their tea anymore.
- It takes at least a yard and a 1/2 of material to make the Ringu skirt
- Colonialism led to Negritude which led to Creolism
- Maxim is a seriously messed up magazine

Let's just look at that last one for a moment, because I had thought it a harmless men's magazine, similar to what Cosmo is for women. In fact, it was purchased for research on a paper that compares it to Cosmo. However, where Cosmo has the fun sex quizzes and makeup tips, Maxim has the following helpful information for the single man: 100 Things You Need To Know About Women

Including:
#87 - Your female coworkers are obsessed with the fact that on average they receive less pay than male counterparts--and the fact that they work less overtime and get pregnant is irrelevant to the discussion
#57 - Most women think they're better drivers than they are. Don't point this out while she's at the wheel or she'll freak and crash
#14 Don't take a woman to a concert you really want to see--she'll just want to leave early
-- I think this one is my favorite --
#73 - Over the course of her life, a woman will use 10 men for every one she loves. If you lent her your car or helped her move and didn't get laid, you're one of the 10. (#73 is also pictured with women in black lingerie and heels holding the numbers ... like ring girls at the fights, but not as oily)

Yeah, they're right. Lending someone a car is worth a f**k. All these years I've just been so crazy prudish...

Midnight in the garden of mediocre and hateful

It's 12:30 and I've only just finished both of my big college papers due on Monday. One I'm okay with, but the other has been nothing but grief. I know I'm doing it all wrong and screwing it up. I feel like a great big faker throwing out words like "dichotomy" and "aesthetic" and all the time harping back to that fricking thesis.

But it worked out, I think. Honestly I don't really know. It's not like talking to people straight, this academic writing. It's like putting on nice clothes that don't really fit you very well, but that look nice anyway, and people will tell you that the outfit looks nice on you, but they can tell that the buttons don't line up correctly and that your slip is showing under the crooked hem.

So I'm downloading Air on the Winamp to bring back my mellow so I can attempt sleep before work tomorrow. For Frenchies they're pretty good and all, those lads of Air.

On a more positive note: mom has promised me a Starbucks gift card if I achieve straight A's. Well, first she promised me Sawyer's stolen Mercedes, but she wasn't in Hawaii at the time, officer, I swear.

Blogbots Are GO

Not to focus too heavily on the way school is creating an unnatural and uncomfortable parallel with my outside life (ie: learning how to Repulse the Monkey in T'ai Chi has many parallels ... my job immediately springs to mind), but now that I've learned how the internet is the new mass media, it shouldn't really come as a surprise to find people using the blogger comments to spam me.

I mean if newspapers are irrelevant, magazines and radio are archaic, the next mass form of communication, after television, is certainly the internet. How dare I try to keep that from advertisers? What am I, some kind of egocentric separatist? Why can't I be sold to on my blog -- better yet, who do I think I am not clicking over to their buyer-blogs? They clearly had an interest in mine:

A real enlightening blog. Don't stop now. Don't miss visiting this site about how to buy & sell everything, like music on interest free credit; pay whenever you want.

See? They said my blog was enlightening. Aren't I just a little bit of an asshole for blowing off their invitation?

Perhaps not.

Today's note of actual learning: I found a website that translates the wedding sing-along song from The Godfather. Viva Il Pompeo Coppini Lodge #2712!

Ciao, il blog!

Today is my first big exam in Italian and I've been pretty focused on it. I've been dreaming in Italian (can't remember if there were celebrities, thanks for nothin' Alka Selzer Plus), thinking in Italian -- mamma mia! I've even tried reading the Yahoo news in Italian:

Torino 2006, pilota F1 Jarno Trulli portera la torcia olimpica.

This seemed so important to the Italians that it appeared on the front page of Yahoo news (along with La famiglia del divo hollywoodiano Brad Pitt entusiasta della Jolie), but I can't find the translation anywhere on English-spoking sites.

(That's also, by the way, a little reference to "Now, Voyager" -- Bette Davis and Paul Henreid are getting lost riding in a taxi through the mountains of Brazil. "The sign said 'English-spoking driver'," quips Bette.)

I'm thinking Trulli's carrying the torch next year and Ferrari is putting a logo on their car at Suzuka on Saturday or ... something. If these things come true, then I should ace this exam. Otherwise all is in readiness for a typical B-average performance.

Actually, I'm only blogging to blog, I guess. Io ho voglio di blog. Poor Dream Log has had the same entry for about 2 weeks now. Flippin' higher education, n' all.

hmmm .... so there's a tutti pazzi on the way for Angelina and Brad. Is that bene or male?