Epiphany

Honest, I only had that one, that one and that one. 

I am now 38 and after an evening of miniature golf (I was an amazing 26 over par), drinking various lagers/liqueurs/ales, listening to Prince and arguing the merits of Roger Daltry vs. Pete Townsend, after having defended my declaration of a crush on Richard Widmark -- I say after all of this activity, I had 3 hours of sleep before getting up for 3 hours of work and 5 hours of Intro"duck"tion at the University of Oregon.

Yet again, I was the oldest student in my orientation group (a familiar setting for all of my failed attempts at a college education). In fact, I was the only one over 20, even counting our student guide. Each and every student member of lucky Group 13 was fresh from high school.

It was incredible listening to them talk to one another and to their parents. They think they know everything because they took AP classes in high school, and some of them were already getting that bright-light look of freedom; that attitude toward their family as though they had the scissors out ready to cut the ties. I'd forgotten what that was like, and it was really interesting reliving that youth-memory through them -- or maybe it was part of the hangover. I tend to get sentimental when I'm hungover.

As an aside, I felt really guilty when the student guide reminded us not to drink in the dorms because they didn't want to have to write us up. Part of me wanted to light up a cigarette and say "Hey, no rules at my house if you guys want to come by."

As to the title of this entry ... dude, all this time I've been going at this college thing backward in a really big way. For some reason I was thinking that it was ALL learning your major and the other stuff was just fluff. In fact I was planning my schedule around filling those requirements first and foremost. Then, suddenly, sitting in that stifling hot lecture room wishing I could take a break for the ladies' room (my GOD, don't kids have to pee these days? I thought I was going to die), when it BAM! absolutely made sense. It's not all about the major. I can take the other stuff now and work the major starting my sophmore year. Hell, there are kids going at it who don't even know what they're going to major in; they pick a major their junior year and complete it in time for graduation! pffft, man ... there's 4 years to do it. I don't know what my all-fire rush was.

I'm off to choose some culture courses and some history, maybe some art and, of course, tai chi.

That's freedom, kids.