Dir. John Gilling
Starring: John Saxon, Maurice Denham, Patricia Haines
It's also known as Blood Beast from Outer Space although neither title adequately describes this movie, except that there's something from outer space and he does like to visit at night, but I don't know that he's necessarily a blood beast, although maybe that part was left out of the finished film, you know, when they edited it down to give it pace and tension.
Oh wait...
Still, in the mode of educational film viewing, I have picked up some valuable life lessons:
Never tell the military brass everything you know about glowing spheres and aliens. You're a scientist, dammit. Those animals just have guns.
Don't expect them to believe you if you're a woman, even if you're somewhat mannish and a scientist, dammit.
If your planet needs women with "looks, personality and ambition" you can pick up a couple hundred through an ad in "Bikini Girl" magazine.
Girls with these kinds of Goon Show characters for parents are easy targets ...
...as are girls who look like Lesley Gore.
Remember that aliens are all around you --- what's the circle behind his shoulder? What's the weird round thing hanging from the ceiling? You think they're harmless, but they look just like the alien space ship --- just like it. Don't get me started on rubber band balls.
And now, the moral of the story --- spoiler alert --- spoken by the Saxon as he watches the alien with bad dental work but "a gentle voice" hop into his glowing rubber band ball and shoot into the sky.
"Let's hope they find the cure and tell us," says ace, not entirely British scientist Jack Costain.
The world is full of hate and war, friends, and Jupiter 3, who lost all their people to "man" made destruction will now repopulate with 20 dopey girls who go alone to porn shops in answers to vague ads looking for "models". That's what you want in your society, because war is the killer:
Seriously??? This alien guy is out for peace and this is how he does it??? He killed the sleazy guy that ran the porn shop and your scientist girlfriend who was either too smart or not good looking enough to help populate a planet! That means the "cure" is swiping Earth's stupid girls and killing the smart ones! No! Bad! Bad! Where the hell is the RAF?!? Shoot that alien down! Shoot to... oh never mind it now.
Which brings us to our closing lesson:
Friends, when life gives you lemons, you make John Saxon and it will all be better again.