Back to School - Back to Reality?

Heard on campus today:

• Dude, my tv's too big for my cooler, dude. (2 uses of dude in the same sentence. Va bene.)
  
• Like, that's when you, like, discover how to, like, you know, use a calculator. Right?
  
• It sucks. Like, I've got to read this WHOLE BOOK.

And 4 instances of "I was just going to say" to begin a sentence. That's a new record. Sure, 2 of those came from the same student, but it still counts.