shrovin' shrovin' shrovin'

Here begineth Lent. Although, due to the flu thing, I did not have a big hamburger yesterday like I usually do, and, actually, for lunch it was this vegan pad thai thing at school (which didn't sit well at first ... stomach rebellion at the lack of food rebellion maybe).

So for 40 days it's time to fast and give up something (um ... I give up passing J204 and casual sex) and confess. In the tradition of my first confession, which was in the glass-doored lobby of the church, I'm going to make this in the glass room of Blogger:

Bless me Blogger for I have sinned. It's been (1 ... 2 ... 3 ...) 28 years since my last confession. In that time I have --

• Frequently used the Lord's name in vain and had other gods (Owen Wilson, Kimi Raikkonen, Robert Louis Stevenson) before Thee. (So that's the first four right there, although I don't think I've made any images of them. I have images, but I didn't make them.)
• I keep the Sabbath Day holy ... for Formula 1 racing.
• I like my mother and father a lot, but I'm not sure if I honor them. I guess I do, so we're all good on that one.
• Haven't killed anyone ... that I'm aware of. If I did something, like if I cut off a guy on the freeway and then he went home and kicked his dog who ran away and bit a child who grew up with fear psychosis and turned into a serial killer ... where would that fit in?
  
• Adultery ... uh ... what are the technicalities? I might be guilty of a technicality.
  
• Jesus (oops! sorry...) I've stolen a lot of Branch's candy since I was a kid. I don't think it's enough to constitute grand theft though, so maybe I'm okay.
• I lie every day. That's a fair cop. But I work in retail, so it's a requirement. I don't think I should get a demerit for this.
  
• I don't covet my neighbor's house -- oh wait, there is that one house on the corner. They have art and everything. Okay, yeah, guilty.
  
• I'm not interested in my neighbor's wife so much, but I like their garden. But maybe that falls under "house."

Other than that I think I'm good with a few Hail Mary's and some sackcloth and ashes, wailing and gnashing of teeth. Happy Lent.